DOHA, Qatar (MindaNews / 08 May 2022) — I know so well and love so much an amazing woman who is resilient in all aspects of her endearing persona. Apart from being lovely inside out, she is as well an optimistic, energetic and a diligent woman. I so admire her calmness because she is impervious to every pain and trial in her life. Thus, she is known in our place as a strong and resolute woman; and she is no other than my cherished mother, Nurhaida.
Most people close to my mother fondly call her “Idang” but she’s “Auntie Idang” to her nephews and nieces who describe her as an authoritarian aunt. Well, I believe they were somehow thankful that my mother was among the ones who nurtured them during their younger days.
From amongs the eight siblings, she is the third oldest. My mother is somewhat slim, tall and pantone 488 C in complexion. Her thick black hair spreads to her thoraco-lumbar junction. She has black eyes.
My beloved mother dresses up simply, and walks gracefully but humbly. She loves to wear “sablay” or other long dresses. Any color of clothes matches her complexion and makes her look stunningly beautiful whenever she wears it. However, she’s not fond of wearing make-up because she believes that simplicity is beauty; she rarely wears high heels, instead she prefers flat ones.
Indeed, I have always known my mother as a shy, humble and patient person. She never intercedes on matters that don’t concern her and her family. She merely keeps herself busy on things that benefit her as well as her household; like tirelessly doing the routine house chores, among others.
In fact, I find it odd that she finds comfort in having always something to do at home. Sometimes, we, her children tell her, “Inah, give yourself a rest, we are here to help you.” Then, she would simply say, “I’m not at ease if I cannot do this, do that. I will feel sick if I will not move around at home to do the house chores.”
Well, the best thing about her is that she regularly goes early to bed and gets up early in the morning.
Every time she laughs that contagious laugh that I do love, her eyes laugh, too, crinkling so much that they’re almost gone. While smiling, tiny wrinkles appear at the corners of her eyes. Of course, to balance it all up, my Inah, like any normal person, also cries at times. I remember when her mother passed away, she screamed and collapsed.
Whenever she is gloomy, she likes to unwind somewhere else like going out just to window shop or merely eat outside. Nevertheless, seeing her cry or sad is one of my weaknesses. I always want to see Inah happy and fine with that familiar gay smile beaming on her face.
One thing that my mother is afraid of is to go for medical check-up when she is sick. If we will ask her to go, she will refuse and merely say, “this is just nothing, it will eventually heal, and I will be alright very soon.” However, when someone close to her gets sick, she will energetically accompany her/him to the clinic or hospital for check-up. Although, sometimes we could persuade her and she would finally heed our advice to go for check-up.
My mother didn’t finish her studies due to her family’s financial dilemma. However, she can read and write well. She loves to read books. Likewise, she is also very good in comprehension and able to convey her thoughts to other people eloquently. She knows how to analyze things, organize, and to put everything in order. Thus, she was able to raise us all well, of course through the help of my father.
When we were still toddlers with my siblings, through Inah’s humble methods, she enthusiastically helped my father to earn for the halal-living of our family. My mother regularly gets up early in the morning. In fact, even before the Fajr prayer, she’s already at our dirty kitchen actively cooking and preparing her “balatu” like “putli mandi”, “daral”, “apam”, “junay”, “empanada”, “bihun-bihun”, and others—which will be sold in nearby schools as well as right outside of our house. This was her routine then.
One of the best things that we always long from her is the food that she scrumptiously cooks. She perfectly loves to cook a variety of Tausug delicacies such as “Kaliya”, “Piyanggang manuk”, Beef “Kurma”, “Tiyula’ Sūg”, among others. Likewise, Tausug confectionaries like “baulu”, “panyam”, “daral”, “putli mandi”, “pitis”, “tabid-tabid”, and many more. In fact, lots of my friends love her specialty “empanada” and “junay.”
Well, every time I see “empanada,” it reminds me of her because it was our small business before. I was the one who assisted her in preparing, cooking and even selling it.
Noteworthy to mention, in our early days, she taught us the importance of being thrifty. I remember the time, she only gave us two pesos per day as our ‘baon’ to school during our elementary days. It was upgraded to ten pesos per day when we reached secondary level. As a result, we all grew up not being extravagant and we learned the value of simple and decent living. She really raised us up with discipline in everything that we do.
She always reminds us that “it’s better to endure while we have something, than to endure when we got nothing.” She constantly ensures that we, her children, enjoy the basic needs that we deserve even if she had to give way just for us.
My mother never fails to wholeheartedly teach us the importance of having good manners and right conduct towards our own family and loved ones, as well as to everyone who comes our way. She has always encouraged us to treat everyone with kindness and compassion. She wants her children to be caring for, to be loving and helping each other in whatever circumstances.
As a loving wife, she loves my father unconditionally. She tirelessly takes care of my father to the best that she can. She manually and meticulously washes and irons the duty uniform of my father and ensures that he will always go for duty presentable and tidy.
When my father arrives home exhausted from work, she cheerfully welcomes him. She encourages him to take a rest for a moment and eventually offers him his favorite brewed coffee. Also, when my father gets sick, she never stops nursing him with the best of care and love that she could ever give. Whenever my father goes for police operation in the countryside, she personally sends him off to the PNP (Philipine National Police) headquarters.
Moreover, just like any other mother, she loves her family so much. She is more than willing to endure and sacrifice for the sake of her family. She bears the pains and trials of our family calmly. On one occasion, I heard her say, “if it is for the welfare of my family, I can sacrifice even more, even if nothing will be left for me, of course, apart from my faith.”
My mother is an honorable woman. When my father got married to his second wife, although at first, she was flabbergasted, she gradually accepted it until she eventually learned to love and care for my stepmom as her own sister and best friend. Thus, the family of my father’s second wife learned to love and value her so much in return.
I am so proud and honored to have an “Inah” like her.
(Mindanawon Abroad is MindaNews’ effort to link up with Mindanawons overseas who would like to share their experiences in their adopted countries. Gamson Jr Mawallil Quijano of Sulu is a registered Radiologic Technologist who works in Doha, Qatar)
