Here’s our attempt to recap VP Sara’s impeachment trial week number 1.

No bloodbath happened as VP Sara wanted.  The public, DDS included, suffered from nosebleed because of the many legal words, most especially “objection.”

“Objection” was uttered 25 times on the second day of the trial, according to Rappler.  This drove speculation that the defense gets to be paid per objection raised.

It took two days just to have one witness giving his testimony and being cross-examined.  With 85 witnesses line up for the trial and the rate this is going, we may have a season 2 of VP Sara on trial.

Or by the time the Senate will vote, Sara might be running for president. Scary.

We complain of getting nosebleed, Cayetanos complained they had stiff necks from watching the videos in difficult angles.  We are amazed how Sen. Robin Padilla  effortlessly splattered his remaining brain cells with his questions.

Padilla asked the NBI witness for his credentials in digital forensics.  One thing we know for sure, is that the NBI agent understands how livestream recordings work, not like Padilla, who wants to get an affidavit from a webcam that recorded the live video.

When the only thing the DDS can criticize about the prosecution is the saliva accumulating in Rep. Luistro’s mouth, and then they begin photocopying money bills after hearing the prosecution’s Atty. Ligutan said that photocopied documents are acceptable in court, someone please tell them to accumulate brain cells.  This is the effect of Sara being education secretary.

A saying goes that love of money is the root of all evil. For the DDS, photocopying money is the root of brainless trolling, and a potential imprisonment. We hope Sara’s defense team can give them pro-bono service.

The first week of the trial focused on the video where VP Sara said she hired someone to off the President, the First Lady and the former House Speaker. 

The prosecution said the threat is legit.

The defense said it was not a threat because nothing happened.

The Philippines was threatened this week by Inday Sara and a Bagyong Inday. 

Both entered the Philippine area of responsibility.  Both blew a lot of air, but did not knock out anyone or anything.

Even Atty. Salvador Panelo sat glued and sleepy in his seat watching the trial.  The bloodbath turned into an afternoon snooze.

(Mind da Noise is a column by jaded Mindanawon observers.)